November 27, 2009

Hola Dad,

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope all is well. Dad, I really wish I could talk to you. I have so many things I want to ask you. Your sister Alberta passed away and it raised many MANY questions about past history.

Joe and I were talking the other day and we wondered out loud what you would have done if Alberta had passed away before you. We both decided that your reaction would have been close to Uncle Edwards. You would have been sad, and you would have wanted to be involved in everything. You wouldn't have mentioned at the funeral all the negative things that happened in your relationship, but instead would have just been a support. I think you would have been sad to see your sister pass away. I bet you were there standing in the wings when she arrived on the other side. Tall and silent, that's how I picture you.

I went with mom to Alberta's viewing and funeral, you would have wanted that. You would want your family to support hers. That's something you and mom taught us, family comes first, no matter what your relationship is or was. It was interesting to compare your viewing and funeral to Alberta's viewing and funeral. The differences having me pondering why they were there, I think I have it figured out...it wasn't really that hard.

The burning questions are about what was said at her funeral about her life and history. Some of the things that were shared about her growing up had some interesting parts left out from the stories you told...I wonder if she didn't know or if she didn't tell her children. Alberta was described as a kind, loving, caring, person with great taste. This is not how I viewed her or how she treated us. Do you think this was because of your relationship with her? Is this because of Grandma Gaer? It is all very strange. Very strange. I know you and mom tried to do all you could. I wish things could have been different, that the relationship would have been there. I think it would have made a huge difference.

Dad, when we see each other in heaven again and if there is a movie of your life...do you think I could watch it? I have all these questions. I would like to see for myself with you sitting by explaining what is going on...just to clear up all my questions.

Much Love,
D'Nell

p.s. Going to Alberta's funeral reminded me how much I miss you. Thank you for watching over me...I know you are. I love you.